It’s not you’re fault at all.

Do you know that if parents get divorced, it’s common for children to find a way to ‘make it their fault’ - even though it’s clearly not their fault. The children think, if I had just been a quieter little girl , or if I had not caused so much trouble with my homework, etc. Mom and Dad would still be together...

I think you are blaming yourself like this.

You don’t know for a fact that he isn’t treating- then ignoring his other clients. You don’t known if he’s so occupied with appointments, finances, anything..that is causing him to act this way toward you.

The point is, it’s not your fault. Please don’t blame yourself.

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You know a bit about my story. Do you believe that was my fault?
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How have you been doing on a search for a female therapist? I know you are feeling devastated but I hope you find a good therapist to help you with this.