Quote:
Originally Posted by theoretical
I can't "sense" others' emotions, but I can read them very easily. I mirror people like nobody's business. I've never known any different. In fact, when I was a kid, I used to think everyone was basically acting, because that's all I was doing. I couldn't figure out how everyone was able to act so easily and all the time, especially during highly emotional situations. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that other people weren't merely acting. 
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I've also got the duping delight thing real bad, and sometimes it physically pains me to not mess with people. It's not malicious, just lighthearted mischievousness (usually), but I think I take it too far sometimes. |
Interesting that you thought people were acting when you were a child. Some people are terrible at acting and everybody can see right through it.
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Do you apologize to people you have "duped?"
I think true intimacy requires disclosure of the person we are inside (not everything but enough to be open about what we are about) and acceptance of the other person. You might not like everything about them but, for me, I want to get to know and be friends with people who have traits I admire. Traits like bravery, intelligence, creativity, morality, compassion and passion. So I think finding a friend involves improving yourself and pursuing life goals you have a passion for then reaching out to people who have similiar goals, values, etc. Many of my friends were involved in the same activites I was. The were mostly classmates and coworkers or friends of my classmates or friends from my college dormitory. In my best past relationships (I always just had a few friends before I was married), I felt a connection from the beginning. The feeling may not always have been mutual but many times, I was told by my friend that it was.
I painted this picture to illustrate that you have to be willing to be open in order to make friends and you might have the best luck with people who possess similiar values and goals. You can't force friendships. It is more like fate brings people together and then, every once and a while, the connection happens.
Have you every felt "connected" to another person? My description of this is that I felt like we were on the same wavelength (thought the same way) about something in our lives.