Quote:
Originally Posted by feileacan
Have you thought about why it is uncomfortable to you?
For me, I suppose there are many reasons I don't want to share dreams. One is that I actually don't want to share anything at all  Because I think that my T might get some pleasure out from me sharing stuff and I don't think he has deserved any pleasure - I already pay him quite a lot, right.
So I suppose I feel that working with me should be hard and difficult work for him without any pleasure component and I try to do all I can to maintain it this way That includes not giving him dreams to work with because I know he likes it.
But my point was that such dreams as I described are already kind of end products. There's no need to bring them to the therapy at all because their message is loud and clear - they demonstrate me how to feel certain feelings I haven't been able to feel yet in waking life. I think that's different from dreams that might be useful for dream work. |
At first it was because there was so much violence in them. These dreams are not nightmares for me. I didn't want to show her what a monster I am/can be/was. I did share with her that I was having violent dreams I didn't consider to be nightmares. I also told her of my intrusive violent thoughts. There's been a lot less violence in both of them and she knows that.
Many of my dreams seem pretty straight forward as well, like the one I shared. So there didn't seem to be much purpose in sharing them.
I can also be embarrassment about my dreams for one reason or another. Like fantasies, they are something that is completely mine, private, owned, ... and so on. I often feel that if I share some of these things then they are no longer mine, that they can be twisted, altered, contaminated/polluted by someone else's interpretations, conclusions, wishes, and desires.
Interesting that you use your sharing or withholding as a power move. I don't think that is why I do it but like I said, there is a part of me that feels like they are mine and to share them means I lose them (or maybe a part of me) in some way.
I have gotten better at sharing them as I started trusting T and as the violence decreased.