Two ot the things that don't go away with bankruptcy are IRS bills and child support Those make up the bulk of my debt.

If you're a person who really wants to screw over your soon to be ex, make the same income as they do until 2 years before your divorce, then just quit working. The court only looks at your last two years of income and sticks the bulk of the bills on the partner making more. I didn't owe child support because my ex couldn't make an income or because I was the sole bread-winner. The other lesson I learned was under no circumstances just let one partner take the kids and wait for the court or police to settle it. While waiting 6 months for the court and police to get my kids back, the bulk of my child support payments built up. The courts allow one parent to kidnap kids and charge the other parent ransom.

Another lesson, if you're the first parent to file the taxes each year, you can claim all the kids even if you don't have them or have shared custody. This is a hard learned lesson because I let my ex do it to me two years in a row and it cost me an additional $4000 in taxes.

You are correct, I can't blame my ex for everything, but I can certainly blame her for changing the direction and course of my life, how I chose to deal with it was my decision.

I tried last year to improve my situation, started jogging a few miles each day and lifting weights, did it for about 4 months and lost about 35 lbs but got tired of it.

I've always been a bit of an antisocial hermit. I can be a salesperson when I need to be, but I don't enjoy it.

I'd really like to just make a small pile of money, pay off all my bills, build a small solar house in Oregon, with views of mountains and a body of water and tinker on old classic cars and grow a garden.