Jp, a lot of posters just saw some red flags they were concerned about. I myself felt what you were describing was very strange and concerning. I also was considering your inexperience with dating and relationships too. As I checked back to read more of what you have learned from this individual the red flag I saw that is important is the ptsd and his self harming challenge. Having ptsd myself, it's not something you ignore when someone talks about struggling with it. It's definitely a challenge that you need to pay attention to, it's not something trivial and some people have it worse than others too. When someone struggles with ptsd, it doesn't mean they are a bad person either. What it does mean is the person does have a challenge and have to work on the fact that they are extra sensitive and will need others to understand how they are affected by it that can be supportive while they themselves are struggling to understand it and slowly learn to manage it.

10 Tips For Understanding Someone With PTSD | Heal My PTSD

The above is one link that talks about ptsd. However, I suggest you look it up yourself and learn about it so you can better understand what this guy is dealing with and how you can be supportive and respectful towards him. Doing some research about this challenge will not only educate you, but also help you learn about what you can do to be supportive and yet also come to see the actual challenge YOU will be facing when it comes to having a relationship with someone who is struggling.

In all honesty, often what others fail to understand about me is that when they respond to me with "just ignore that person, don't allow that person to upset you, don't give that person power over you" they are failing to "get" that none of those responses are helpful at all. What someone with ptsd wants very badly is to be able to actually "just" and they can get very frustrated with how things affect them more than they care to be affected. What stands out to me is how this guy has people around him that offer him a very different "kind" of security. If you take time to read and learn about ptsd, you will start to understand it all better. It will also be appreciated as well.