Thanks for the responses. Unfortunately I have addicts and alcoholics in my life, my own mother, sister, and husband. I am in recovery myself. I haven't used in over two months...not a single thing. Anyway, as a ex junkie myself, I did most of my active/harmful using when I was 13-16. It wasn't in my capabilities to explain my addiction and behaviors and attempt to justify then either. If somebody asked me why I did it, I'd say because it makes me a stronger person, more motivated. Now for my Mom she says repeatedly "It's a disease". I understand that addiction is an disease, but does it make it okay? Like being overweight from a thyroid condition...is it the same sort of thing here?