I need your opinion please. Any input is more than welcome...

So theres a guy (colleague of mine) i like and i think he likes me back but since im IP, at the moment, we only communicate through texts. And its through texts that we both dared to say we care about each other a lot. There was nothing said before these texts.
He doesnt know im IP or about any other issue.
We should meet on wed if they let me out
But im afraid of explaining him this long sick leave (2 weeks).
So i started giving him hints.
Am i trying to sabotage it all before it starts as i always do, or is it wise of me to warn him a little bit i may be difficult and with some issues?
Is it right or wrong? Am i slowly and carefully trying to informe him or am i sabotaging it all because im scared?
What am i doing?
What do i do now? How do i proceed?

Im afraid that only hearing the word "depression" will scare him away! But i feel i must say it to tell him.the truth...

HELP PLEASE, I KNOW I DONT DESERVE IT BUT IM BEGGING YOU...