I don't know what to say. I've erased what I've typed at least three times now. 
I am afraid to interact face to face with people, but I work in a library. 
I'm not sure how much longer I can keep torturing myself. I'm the only breadwinner, and I barely make enough for us to survive, forget being able to afford things I enjoy. 
I also work with someone who is toxic - it's taken me a very long time to realize how toxic this person is. Being forced to interact with this person five days a week only makes my 'phobia' worse. I'm 48, and jobs are not easy to come by in the rural Midwestern United States. I'm on an anti-anxiety, and working on recognizing my anxiety and on keeping things in perspective. Some weeks are definitely better than others.
__________________
'Religion is for people who are afraid of going to Hell.
Spirituality is for those who have already been there.'
--Vine Deloria
'Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.'
--Anonymous
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