I'm nothing but kind to people, I'm a nice person, I don't have a bratty or stuck-up bone in my body. I'm willing to divide tasks to help my co-workers get things done faster, collaborate, etc. I generally like people and see no reason to treat anyone badly for my entertainment or whatever. That fast food pizza job only lasted a week, I'm waitressing in a restaurant now. The thing is, I know these jobs don't suit my personality but I've been struggling to get my foot in the door, I've been taking anything I can get. My parents pushed me into the work force right after high school and I didn't really get the chance to figure out who I was or what I liked or what I wanted to do with my education. They chose my major (English), wouldn't talk to me about other options so I feel like this set me back and limited my options. It's hard to get a job period, but food service and retail seem like my only options without special experience/degrees. This is my 9th job and the only two that were perfect and I didn't have any problems were seasonal only and the terms ended, sadly. I did like those jobs as a chocolatier and sales associate in a candy shop. I work in a chain restaurant now.

The thing is with the trash thing (that's not the only issue), the other women bussing the tables will separate the trash themselves if they're doing it but pile it up when I'm doing it so I have to get all in the trash. Also, it's expected that the trash and dishes are separated to be courteous to the dishwashers.

I'm only miserable when people treat me like the archetypal servant in period-era movies who isn't spoken to and is generally shunned socially unless being given orders and I make an effort to connect with my coworkers by asking about their day, making small talk, etc. Like I said, I'm always on time, I make myself available to cover shifts during emergencies but people are extra rude to me. During my first week, I asked when payday was and the boss was very sarcastic, asked me what day today was and made me "guess" and it was like pulling teeth to get him to just tell me when that's all he had to do. It's never simple with these people and they always take that extra step to be hostile. I can understand why you don't believe me because you're not here to witness it with your own eyes, but if I knew why this was happening to me, I wouldn't be posting it.

Also, I'm good at masking my emotions. I don't talk back, I don't complain and I perform the necessary tasks. I don't fight/argue, I don't cry or whine or make displays so I don't think it has to do with my "portrayal" as I'm venting online --- which I think is fair. At the end of the day, I'm only human and need some expressive outlet. It's not like I walk around telling the staff I'm unhappy with the situation. I wouldn't be unhappy if they didn't give me a reason. It's not that I'm simply bored with the job description, because I understand taking what I can get for the time being. I never expected waitressing to be "fun".

There have been jobs I've genuinely enjoyed but I've been outcast for mysterious reasons, which wouldn't align with attitude as the root of the problem (the candy shop even despite an uncomfortable uniform, etc). I liked what I did and everything about that place but I could tell there was something wrong with the culture and others seemed averse to me. Something is going on and it's not fair and I'm just trying to figure out why I don't fit in. I don't consider myself a senseless or childish person at all, I just want better for myself and I keep hoping a change of environment/change might make a difference and it's not. Whether I like the job or not, my team members expressively dislike me and I'm bewildered.