I wanted to add that I knew for a long time before the end of our relationship that he was lying to me and inventing his personal history, faking flashbacks and all the rest. I didn't realize how harmful it would end up being to me to get involved in trying to 'manage' him or 'help' him or all the excuses I came up for staying in the relationship, long after I knew better. On his final discard I ended up in a highly codependent frame reference and was devastated. I had to recognize that I could have avoided him altogether if I had paid attention to warning signs on our first date. We went to a Vietnamese restaurant and he broke down in tears recounting some special mission he had been on.