Are the Director and the lawyers aware of your struggles, Cookie22? Surely they'll be able to forgive your mistakes! You ARE trying your best and that's ALL we humans can do and it's ALWAYS more than enough! Don't beat yourself up! Mistakes can happen and that's revisions are for after all! Just try to avoid doing some of the major mistakes and try not to focus too much on the smaller ones! I hope they're aware of your condition and that they're not treating yourself badly! If that's the case, perhaps it's the work environment that needs to change? Just some thoughts! Definitely talk to your Pdoc about ALL of this and see how it goes from there! Hopefully he'll be able to help you and to take off the Meds that are "clouding" your thinking! Please remember that it is NOT your fault and you can ONLY do your best which is what you're already doing! Just try to be careful but other than that you really have nothing to blame yourself for! Please NEVER give up hope! I'm sure things will get better soon for you one way or another! Let us know how things are going for you and when they start to get better for you! We all DO care about you! THAT'S A PROMISE! Wish you the BEST of luck in BOTH your healing and your life! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you and your family, Cookie22!