Hi. I have been suffering from PTSD for two years, after being exposed to intense and prolonged stress because of delusions and hallucinations I had during psychedelic experiences. I have lived wonderful experiences while high on them, but I lived also some deeply traumatic ones (several ones on LSD, one on 2C-B, one on ayahuasca, one on mescaline and one on mushrooms). I was 18-19 years old. Now I am almost 21 years old.
I will not describe them because I don't want to trigger reactions in anyone. I myself am not comfortable telling them, especially at night. I start shivering and having anxiety. When I get reminded of them by external noises or scenes or environments, I live the same sensations and sometimes I start having visual distortions as well. Some nights I have sleep paralysis. The symptoms have been lessening since I stopped using all psychoative substances, after a mental breakdown in which I had a huge flashback lasting for two weeks. Sometimes randomly I still get anxiety. It feels like my muscles are always tense and I get easily distracted by everything. When I wake up I feel depressed and I don't know if it's related.
My therapist says that I won't be able t communicate to people what I have been through and that I don't need to do it. But I still feel like I am forever changed. She says that I am, but I can move on. Instead I feel like those negative emotions are imprinted into my body and that I won't be able to heal completely. Is there someone else here who has PTSD from psychedelic experiences? Have you managed to feel like your old self again?