I agree with the two other posters, much respect and hugs.

PS my parental units were what you stated (and much more). I have had some abusive relationships with users and abusers who groomed me etc .... I do not need my fur groomed by abusers. Now I have a loving marriage with Papa bear. I have much belief you will also find a lasting loving relationship and will be able to make the necessary changes. Please keep us updated. Many of us here have big, attentive ears.

You sound like a lovely person and I send you gentle hugs.