i never thought my family was in a domestic violence situation. not until this decade. i knew there was fighting and putdowns and public humiliation, and i knew my dad was a monster... but to me DV was hitting and leaving broken bones. We never sought help. Besides, in the 80's, who would have helped? No one. Are there bruises? no. Are there broken bones? no. so, suck it up. that's what we did. Chairs went flying, mom got pushed out and locked out, kids hid under the table, cabinets shook and dishes fell out... and we just went on. family members cried out of humiliation, and kids got spanked with handprints that lasted hours... that was life. ya know?