I’m sorry your feeling this way. I have never had ECT so I can only imagine how it feels and what it takes from you. I agree that writing things down might be helpful.
Give yourself a big pat on the back , your response in the daily check in showed you have had a busy productive day.
I really have no grand advice , I feel for you when you post about the struggles you face with ECT. The sun is shining and I hope you find some stability and just enjoy days where Bipolar is in the back ground and not front stage.