Fuzzy, one of the things I am doing now is when I extend myself as a listener and end up facing that person's anger and they don't see that I am struggling and it's the last thing I need is I just walk away from that person.
I already know I don't have ALL the answers and I don't have super powers and I can't FIX others either. I try to be respectful and considerate and listen and I have learned now not to expect the same from others and they often do let me know. Now I need to recognize that and actually believe them when they show me the flags that tell me "sorry about your problems, now I need to talk about ME, ME, ME". Looking back I have noticed this kind of pattern when someone will unload on me in a way that is unhealthy for me. Typically this kind of individual doesn't look at you very much or notice your challenges. This kind of person tends to need you to service their needs and only looks at you when you make them unhappy in some way and you did not crouch enough when they needed to dump anger out on you. They just cant hear your tears over their own PERIOD.