I really want to go to the hospital for meds. to get better. But my last stay wasn't the best and I am really stressed about it. I agree I need new meds.,but I am also really afraid. I feel totally estranged from you. I"m afraid you are mad at me because I am not going to get meds. You might not care, though? It might not matter to you either way. I just feel like bawling all the time, I really feel emotional, and that isn't regular for me. I just wanted you to know how really upset about this all. I know it doesn't affect you like it does me, But it's really painful for me.