Now there’s this annoying dynamic where, when she starts with me, I’ve said in the past that I have to go. So now she picked up on that and this time did it to me. It feels like I stepped in dog poo.

How can I call her every several days (like once a week) and have a pleasant exchange of what a mother-daughter conversation should be?

My one sister does what my h calls a ‘hit and run conversation’. She talks a mile a minute telling Mom what’s happening with her and doesn’t give her a chance to speak, then ends the call. My sister was doing this to me, too, when all was fine (so I thought) in our relationship. She and I have not spoken since the family fallout from the Kavanaugh hearing.

The relationship between my mom and other sister consist of only my sister calling Mom (Mom refuses to ‘dial out’). I think it is as toxic as the dynamic with me.

Then there is my mom and her sister. My aunt tells me that is the most toxic of all. My mom insists her memories of her own life are in reality memories of my aunt’s life. they fight constantly.

I feel sorry that my mom is basically alone in her apartment in very much physical pain. All she does is write her memoirs that no one will ever read. She trolls facebook for attention. She fights on the phone with her family. And she fights with her husband who ignores her.

What can I do to make this look more like a Norman Rockwell picture of loveliness? I live only just less than an hour away from her. I am the only one who lives close. Therefore, I have gotten the brunt of having had much more physical interaction with her- holidays ruined, until I put an end to inviting her.

How can I make peace with a sick, mean, elderly mother who I’m afraid is NPD?