@AspiringAuthor, lol... I am very much a perfectionist. haha. But Divine is right on this one. I lowered my standards by far with this ex, and certainly didn't raise the bar enough. I am not beating myself up about it like I used to... I got past that stage. Now I'm just... well, still beside myself over the additional lies I learned.

@theoretical, I think the point that AspiringAuthor may have been making is how that relates to my self esteem. I am guessing, because he had squashed some of my self esteem.

@divine1966, yes, I see your point, though like I wrote above, I think there was merit to the question. It made me realize that yes, he would be proud of me, and yes, in fact, I know he thought very highly of me, which points even further to the likelihood that he just wanted to hurt me by saying he loved his ex more. I am connecting the dots, perhaps incorrectly, but I am trying to see the connection.

Thank you all... it really helps to gain support around this issue... I really need it!