Loneliness is certainlty painful, Hjr2942 Do you see a therapist right now? Maybe that could help! I feel like that may certainly help you. You could learn many new things and many new ways to cope with your feelings. Please DO consider it if you aren't seeing one already. If you already are, I apologize immensely to you. It is hard to create meaningful relationship with other people, whether they'd be friends or romanitc relationship, when we're struggling with ourselves. That's why I suggest to work on yourself and what you feel like it's lacking in your life. I know it's not easy but I'd suggest to try to do that As for your friends, if they are TRUE friend they'll understand how you truly feel and they WON'T judge you. I'm sure they'll understand. If you're still worried though, you could try to send them an apology or something like that. Not that I think you did anything bad, really, but perhaps that may help you feel better with yourself and with them as well. They may also understand how you TRULY feel and perhaps they'll try to support you in this difficult moment you're going through. Just a thought! Please keep us updated on your situation if you can and want and let us know how things are going for you. We ALL do care about you! THAT'S A PROMISE! Wish you the best of luck in BOTH your healing and your life! Sending many safe, warm hugs to you, Hjr2942, and to ALL the people you love and who love you!