I see all the possibilities of everything that is occurring around me...probable outcome and secondary possibilities in a split second I have already drawn in my brain a diagram of what is going on around me.
I take mental notes of things that could contribute to what is going on right now that may have led up to this point in time, then I compare this to any past pattern that I have seen and I convince myself that I already know what is about to happen.
When I’m wrong , my skin feels like tiny bugs are biting me , I can’t understand words that I’m hearing and clocks ticking make my brain feel tight and I can’t form words in my mind or speak. Saying I get confused is putting it very mildly.
I then go back over what has happened NOT to grasp how it ended but to figure out where I was wrong on my calculations.
I count everything I take from one area to the next. I have to have all my household and personal items in the same spot at all times, if they are out of place I get confused and feel stupid and I can’t move until I figure out how the things got moved.
I’m so tired of being called controlling when all I want is to know that things are where I put them and that I’m not losing my memory.