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Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel
This makes me sad. Especially all the people who thanked this. I'm assuming you all agree.
1. That you do think I need more treatment. I agree that I have issues still -- with relationships, socializing, self esteem and confidence. But, imho, I thought I was doing pretty good. I haven't cut in over 4 years, I'm stable on my meds (minus reactivity), I've gained a lot of my interest back that I lost when ex-T left me, I've come very far from ex-T leaving me, etc. I was doing so good at one point that I was able to try and have a baby. H is a little better especially from last year. I have my dad as a support now. I accepted L into my life. I just think I'm doing pretty good considering everything I've been through and my diagnosis.
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Scarlet, I absolutely do not doubt that you have come far and are doing well, compared to how things were before. But do you really think that you wouldn't benefit from a steady, consistent and regular treatment with someone? Consider for instance the extremely intense emotions that made you start this thread. Wouldn't you want to have some more calm inside you, such that such intense emotions wouldn't hold such a power over you? I personally believe that this calm can be achieved but it takes a good and consistent therapist and more time than 2 years. It would be more than just symptom relief.
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but she does allow me to go back to weekly when I need it. And my H also prefers me to go every other week; not weekly.
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Does she really allow you? Who decides what you need - you or her? And what about yourself - the T might have an idea how she prefers to work and your H might have an idea what he prefers but what about yourself? You are an autonomous person and no one knows better than yourself what you need and want. Don't you think that this is something that you might still need to work on therapy as well - to really find yourself and not rely so much on others to decide what you should want and need.
I'm not saying what you should do. I'm just suggesting to think about this option, just consider it for yourself.