Don't feel bad about needing a break from your mom--there are reasons for this. Sometimes we need a break from even the most loving people in our life and your mom can be tough to deal with. It is better that you take time off from seeing her so that you are fresh and able to deal with her in a positive manner. Like me, IMO, you sometimes feel guilty about things that you shouldn't feel bad about. Your mother probably has "guilted" you from birth in order to shape you into a moral person and devoted daughter. My mom did this and I think her motives for it weren't all bad. She was doing the best she could.

I am sorry your H violated your trust. Have you gotten him to at least acknowledge how you feel? From my POV, there is no use asking people to make "promises" (because then they might just go behind your back) but they should at least hear out your complaints.

When my H and I got out of the Air Force, he started his own business working from home. Many years, it lost money. He made me the Secretary/ Treasurer! We fought like cats and dogs sometimes (especially when it was losing $--funny how I was willing to do the payroll and taxes without complaining when it was making $ )

He wants to RV part time when he retires which is somewhat attractive except that when you are fighting, you can't escape to another room. When I was in hs, my family had a 5th wheel. We drove to Carlsbad Cavern's in New Mexico during Thanksgiving, a place that doesn't usually get much snow but they had the snowstorm of the century which actually shut the park down. We were stuck in that 5th wheel and my mom and I fought like cats and dogs. I ran outside but the snow was too deep to stay outside for very long. RVs stay cold in the winter. I foresee that our RV adventure will be a mixture of good and bad. It's a good thing that I take a lot of drugs now.......