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Old Jun 28, 2019, 01:12 PM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,226
You are certainly not to blame for his abuse. It’s good to reflect so it doesn’t happen again but surely you didn’t cause him to behave this way.

I think your own lack of clarity (understandable) made it difficult for people to know what support you need. On one hand you are agreeing he is user and abuser and you should just move on but on the other one you argued that it wasn’t the case and you focus on how much he loved you and how you have to forgive him and keep checking up on him and even anticipate his contact.

So it’s hard to tell if you want support with moving on with your life or support with seeking declaration of love from him and asking for forgiveness from this guy. In my opinion he is a rather lousy human being and isn’t worth another 5 minutes of your or anyone else’s time. Sure he could become an upstanding citizen but I’d not hold my breath plus he is hopefully out of your life.

It’s hard to provide support when it’s not clear what the person wants. I doubt anyone wished you harm in all this.