Hi fern46, I appreciate your sharing. I feel like I need some input which is why I am posting here. It's 10 days until I see my pdoc and I might not get back to her until after I see him. She took several days to respond to me and that is all she wrote. I feel disappointed and let down by her apology.
I had tried to explain what was missing in her apology for me, which was an acknowledgement of my feelings. But I can see that is not going any further, she isn't capable of that. I think you are right that my only choice is to forgive her or stop being friends.
I don't think she is truly remorseful. I don't recall her ever saying to me that she experienced remorse for anything. I don't think it is in her repertoire. As I have written before, I had thought for a long time she was a narcissist but I didn't expect her to be so blatantly disregarding of my interests and welfare.