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Human
Member Since Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,350
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Jun 28, 2019 at 02:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by golden_eve
"What is probably the biggest barrier to spotting potential for abuse early on, though, is an abuser typically hides behind a façade of public charm, said Nancy Virden, a mental health and recovery advocate and founder of Always the Fight Ministries in Cleveland. “Abusers believe they are right and entitled to admiration. Publicly, they present as put-together, fit into the environment around them and often pass as the nicest, if not the most honest, guy in the room.”
That charm makes it easy to court someone. Virden says it may morph into power and control over a partner." |
This was my family, especially my parents. No one would believe the abuse going on at my home. And I presented as this perfect, high-achieving kid. No one suspected a thing. But I'm not making it up. My mom is much better now, and my stepdad talks about the abuse that my father did to my mother and he completely believes and could see that it was happening, the abuse to me. He sees it now even. His validation, without having seen it, has meant a lot to my healing.
Everyone else in my family (besides mom and stepdad) denies any abuse. And maybe that's because they don't know any better. Maybe they honestly think that's normal and healthy for people.
Doesn't matter what they thought. It was abuse. And it wasn't my fault. And no one knew or would have suspected because my dad comes off as a really nice guy and caring father in public. He wasn't. He's not.
Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?
Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.
Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien
Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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