I think for me it must be the language. I am trilingual with English being my third, learned way in my adulthood so some slight nuances might escape me. When you say someone “took advantage of you”, to me it sounds the same as someone “used you”. So when you said he took advantage of your finances and your love but didn’t use you, it honestly made no sense to me. Now I think perhaps these two phrases have slight difference in meaning, which I am just not grasping.

And I am not grasping (and this time I don’t think it’s language) how loving words have more weight and meaning than abusive actions. I never in my life thought that words mean more than actions. I literally feel like I am in alternate universe. I refuse to defend abusers because they say all the right words. I can’t grasp it. And I rarely can’t grasp something.

So I am bowing out. Wish you luck in all this