Technically, sure, but you'd have a helluva time getting me to accept that, and I won't.

But I didn't bring up that story to argue the technicalities of abuse. Instead, I wanted to point out a problem with the narrative of the abuser/victim dichotomy. It's too exaggerated, too black and white, and too rigid. The common perception we have of an abuser simply doesn't reflect what we actually experience, and therefore people sometimes fail to recognize an abusive situation, especially when it's non-physical. I was hit, and I still don't see it as abuse.

There was a recent discussion involving someone who described an incident that was very obviously abuse, and the reaction to her post was one of horror and dismay. The other posters insisted that the behavior was abuse and that the OP was in grave danger. The OP, much to everyone else's horror, argued against that fact. And I can kind of understand why she would do that. These are very emotionally loaded terms -- which is our doing -- and I can see why it would be difficult for someone to accept that reality.