@Fuzzybear , it's funny but we are on the same page with the things we hate. But you've been so sweet to me and others as I peruse and surf the forums, I can hardly believe anyone would dare hating YOU. It's ok tho, you know how your life and the people in it are and treat you like, so I won't even doubt it.

Hatred begets more hatred and violence, have you found that to be true too Fuzzy? I try to cleanse myself of these dark negative feelings all the time, and yet the voices I hear come and DESTROY it all, grabbing me by the throat and THROWING me back into my old hatred for people, my old desires for elaborate revenge and so on. It's a sad state of affairs, but the thing is, if I didn't flow with this and got back up, got out of their hate and healed myself, at least partially, again and again. I would have broken down already, I woulda snapped and God knows what I would have done.

So yeah, my advice to you @Fuzzybear is to seek any method you can, for relaxation, for eliminating or diminishing anxiety and inner turmoil. Any method that somehow fills your heart with a lot, a lot, A LOT of LOVE my friend. Cause as cliche and cheesy it might sound, it's true that LOVE is the antidote for hate.

To this end, I suggest meditation for example, which sometimes changes you from the inside out, if you manage to do it well and for long enough. Do some "Metta" or "Loving-kindness" meditation, where you send love and good wishes, even to those you hate. You could also try EFT Tapping which is so relaxing and it deals with whatever issue one is going through and it's very customizable for each person's different experiences. Body scans and soothing music are godsends for me on YouTube. And so on.

Remember you don't HAVE to live with hatred inside. It's a poison, it kills you spiritually and emotionally. If it's there, feel it honestly and let it flow out of you again and again, don't guard against it or run from it, but the best way in my opinion, is to not let oneself be dragged into that area of feeling at all in the first place.

Best of luck my friend. See you around the forums. I hope this helps at least a bit. I wrote it with the best of intention.