I'm so sorry you and your friends are hurting SO MUCH, Icedgem It seems like she wants to avoid talking about those problems because she's afraid of getting hurt more if she does. That's my opinion anyway. As for what you can do to help her, I'd say that just listening to what she has to say is more than enough. However her decision to talk is up to HER. Perhaps she just wants someone to talk to, not necessarely about her problems. In that case I'd say that you're already helping her out. Whether or not she wants to open up more will be up to her. Of course I'm not saying that you did WRONG by asking her that. In fact I'd say it was kind of you. Just remind her that you'll be there for her if she wants to discuss heavy things but that you'll be available if she just wants to talk about something else as well. Does she see a therapist right now? I certainly hope so. Perhaps you can try to suggest her that if you feel like she'll listen to you. Hopefully she won't take it as an attack. Either way, just be there and listen to her if she wants to talk. That's what you can do as a friend. Getting the help she needs is up to her. You can give soem advice but the final decision is on HER shoulders. Stay safe and take GREAT care of yourself as your health is VERY important as well. We can't fully help others if we're not helping ourselves first. Just try to do your best. That's ALL we humans can do after all and it's ALWAYS more than enough. Sending many safe, warm hugs to you and your friend, Icedgem, and to ALL the people you love and who love you!