Quote:
Originally Posted by susannahsays
I don't really think it's your mother's job to validate your feelings and avoid triggering you by not asking a basic question such as the one described.
I'm not saying your mom is a good mother or anything. I have no idea. Just doesn't make sense to me to expect other people to manage one's feelings. It also sounds like you want your mother to validate your experience and feelings, but you aren't willing to offer her the same in return. Maybe communication should be kept to family therapy until you've both done more work there.
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Thank you for telling me your thoughts. I wanted honest feedback, so I appreciate it. I feel a pretty bad about my texts now. I think I’m struggling with what you said about it not being my mothers job to validate my feelings. I understand my mom is not a therapist and I should be able to talk to her about anything, but as I mentioned in my post, ongoing invalidation by her has been very difficult for me and my overall ability to trust and emotionally attach to her. However, I also don’t want to go to the other extreme of expecting too much from her.