I have to agree with the above suggestion. You've lost confidence in your ability to help yourself and thus the ability to simply cure yourself by force of will. You've also lost confidence in every single member of your social support structure.

Your best bet is to find a councelor/psychistrist/therapist that you feel you can trust and then do so. A sympathetic person to listen to your fears and offer advice with no alterior motives. I know many churches offer free marriage counceling, which could be a good place to start. Personalized professional therapy can be expensive and you're not well off financially, but you can find friends and relatives willing to foot the bill if they believe it'll help. Even among people you're not close to you will always be supprised how willing people are to care for someone who really needs their help.