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Originally Posted by Roamer1115
Do you talk this stuff out with the T?I mean how you think and feel about what or how the t is acting and stuff in your sessions?
From my experience only recently, not talking first to my t and finding out what her thoughts etc were, then doing my own processing of the situation, I think, it could have save a bunch of headache. Finally most of my situation has been resolved directly with T. Still by talking to my Social Worker, it started the ball rolling in the wrong direction so, now I am waiting for my turn to finish this other stuff...that never should have happened. My stuff was only a misunderstanding in communication talk, not anything physical. Turns out most of this was Boundary issues on my part, misunderstanding on how friendly and sharing of her own stuff was in fact keeping within her Professional boundaries and my feeling or need of making her a friend. I know T's are not friends...but I kinda didn't realize the stuff I was expecting that was contributing to my own feelings of rejection, anger and confusion.
I did do my research though it took some time and I found the best articles here at PsychCentral in the search for boundaries, that cleared so much of this up for me.
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I would always try to settle conflict / dissatisfaction directly with anyone first, before I complain to a third party. The thing with that T though was that he could not take criticism and became extremely defensive, threw it back to me with some twisted interpretation, just not receptive and was unwilling to discuss and take responsibility. At the same time, he encouraged me to go to session and tell him my concerns as a form of treatment, to express my anger. But what for if the concerns are not received really, I generally don't have issues with anger and don't tend to bottle it up, am pretty direct. It made no sense to me and I found it useless to pay a T high $ to just fight with him. So I just left.
In my case, it had nothing to do with my boundaries or needing/expecting unrealistic things from him. It started out with his sloppiness: he was repeatedly unable to correctly fill out his portion on my insurance claim forms, always made mistakes and I had to redo the forms multiple times and got very upset when I complained. He also tried to impose authority that he never earned and often talked to me as though I was a kid or something. And told me very inappropriate things several times. He was also a complete mess with his own boundaries. The guy is just plain insecure and incompetent, IMO. What is there to talk about, really, don't see how that would have served me well. He was also pretty useless for me as a therapist and actually would have made some of my issues worse if I listened to him. He also refused to respond to my requests for his therapy notes repeatedly - I am almost sure because he did not keep proper ones. Would fit with his overall sloppiness and unprofessionalism.
I tried to post reviews on my experience online but he managed to have them removed, together with other negative reviews I had seen. I am sure any complains would have been unsuccessful and mostly just would have cultivated resentments dealing with it. He does a lot of social media and I have seen him many times just removing critical posts, much like the reviews and his inability to face challenge in person.