Your post really resonated with me, MatBell. In fact, I haven't called my dad in years (like... a decade) because I feel like either I don't have any good news and/or that I just don't quite live up to.... something. (His other children pretty well followed the book of "supposed tos"). We were estranged from about 4 till I was 40 thanks to my controlling and lying mother, then, you know, it just sort of becomes the status quo, you get busy, go day to day and it never crosses your mind. We did reunite for a few years and it went well. We didn't discuss anything deep either, but we're talking generations that really didn't anyway. (Almost needless to say I don't speak with my mother. I debate from time to time giving her a piece of my mind, but she's never accepted responsibility for anything she's done, so it'd likely be pointless.) Wow, that sounds so sad, but actually to me "it is what it is".


But nevermind me, I hope you can find a way to feel better about the situation. Maybe try to ease into something a little deeper, but not too deep to start. See how it goes. I wish you the very best.


P.s. I like your new avatar.