I'm sorry you're having such a tough time.

I was effectively housebound for a number of years due to avoidant personality disorder. Only getting out for absolute essentials and rare occasions. I think I have some idea what you're going through. Life feels so narrow and it's so easy to get upset and demoralized when even that goes poorly.

Would it be possible to get some local group or gathering to meet at your place instead of wherever they currently do (usually church basements and windowless community center rooms)? I dunno ... book club, quilting, other gamers, volunteer groups, etc. A small group on a weekly basis might make a huge difference. Just a thought.