I COMPLETELY agree with the other wise, wonderful posters about journaling Remember that your previous self didn't go away as @fern46 has already wisely said better than I ever could. There's still a part of that into you NOW. You've changed and evolved but you're not a different person from before. You're still Crook32 and there's NO ONE ELSE LIKE YOU. Please remember that as I believe it's REALLY important Please be kind to yourself and remember that your life isn't over. You can still do many things. Give yourself some time to grieve. I'd also suggest to bring up your concerns to your therapist if you haven't already and if you want to. I'm sure he/she will be glad to help you and to make you understand HOW can you grieve You've got this! Please don't you EVER give up hope! THINGS CAN AND WILL GET BETTER FOR YOU! I'M SURE OF THAT! Sending many safe, warm hugs to you, Crook32, and to ALL the people you Love and who TRULY Love you! YOU DO ROCK IT VERY MUCH, PLEASE ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT! KEEP ROCKING!