I can relate to much of what your´re writing. With my former T I felt both like a child getting support but through getting hugs and compliments from my therapist I also got sexual thoughts about her. She was about twelve years older than me.

As you mention I have felt attraction to both this former T specifically but also towards counsellors I´ve talked to more briefly. My former T sometimes wore low cut shirts and happened to lean forward and I saw "too much" of her breasts which was part of making me think of her sexually.


I though not imagine me having sex with her or other counsellors, I instead think of if they have a partner (if they haven´t told me already), if they have sex with him (her) or with themselves. I also get thoughts like "do she and her husband have any sex life as they live in a rather small flat together with adult children?" and similar.

I could perhaps tell a future T about this but before I told her anything I would ask her if she´s comfortable in talking about erotic transference that also includes the therapist herself and not only past therapists.


Do you experience those feelings every time you see your therapist?