Thanks, all. I think the key for me is accept the diagnosis and resist the urge to reassure myself (which is OCD driven). My first doctor mentioned it was a possibility and gave me some mood stabilizers, but she never officially diagnosed me. I got a second opinion, and he was more convinced and officially diagnosed me as bipolar 2. He echoed some of the comments on here that a non bipolar patient might have mania during antidepressant use, but it would go away after stopping it. Mine continued even after I discontinued antidepressants.

Any way, I feel pretty good about the diagnosis overall because I can see instances of hypomania even in childhood. It’s just so easy for me to second guess it each time I take a bipolar meds that doesn’t work or that makes me feel not like myself. Perhaps I need to get used to the new me!