(((((((((((silversparrow))))))))))))))

I agree with Lyn.

In my experience...
First step is wanting to want to change.
Second is wanting to change.
Third is putting things in place so you *can* change
Fourth is changing...
And fifth... well, I don't know that yet.

You've made some important realizations in this post, you really have - so good job.

How can we help?