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I applaud you for setting boundaries- the trick will be continuing to set them and stick to them. Since you can only change how you act and not your mom I recommend thinking about not reacting to her. Even when you feel like you are burning inside, keep your voice neutral and state your wishes. If she acts a certain way and you choose to not be with her (like your birthday) maybe consider a follow up. " We are going to stay home because i am uncomfortable with what you are doing. The next time we get together I hope this does not happen but if it does I will have to stay home again". It sort of says what you mean and sets up some expectations.
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"I carried a watermelon?"
President of the no F's given society.
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