Ezrigirl I am glad that just my posting offers you support. I am sorry you are feeling this way and that you feel you cannot have a relationship or a full life. I do know some people are successful in having relationships with bipolar disorder, some I know in real life. It might require medication and therapy to be stable enough to maintain a relationship and it is definitely not easy. Your last post is talking about some triggering topics. Do you know how to add trigger warnings? I think that might be helpful for some people here. Generally anything related to harming oneself should have a trigger warning.