I’m sure this is terribly hurtful for you. Is it possible to have a talk with him about why he says he wants a divorce when he’s angry? I’m wondering if you can each discuss it objectively, without getting upset but with the intention of finding a solution? Emotions aren’t logical or rational. Maybe if you guys can figure out what triggers this behavior you can diffuse it. Also, maybe if he can truly see how he’s hurting you that would also help. It wouldn’t help to argue over it or guilt one another though. A counselor could really help you guys with this. Maybe if you guys have a few heartfelt talks he would come around to the idea of counseling? Or just schedule the appointment and say you’re going with or without him?