Quote:
Originally Posted by cavaliers
Some of us are laughing at this. So feel free! But it's become a serious issue. Been seeing T for years. Very slow to trust enough to start working. Our abusers were male. Slowly younger ones & abused ones came to trust & talk to T. Considered him a person we could tell anything & everything to & do something he asked even if we weren't 100% comfortable. Often when one would generalize that all men are *bad*, he'd say there are good men. His words were dismissed. Recently he followed that with I'm a man. Like a bolt of lightning hit the system. Some became fearful enough that protectors came. Totally rattled. Ask what they thought he was: T, friend, helper on & on but male or man didn't make the list. Others opposite reaction, if you know what I mean. Never thought this needed to be mentioned or discussed. Actually thought it was obvious!!!!! Has gender of your T ever been an issue? Any wise words?
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no my therapists gender does not bother me. when looking for a new therapist I always keep in mind that I (and my system before I was integrated) work better with female. therefore when my insurance goes by their listing, I call my insurance to find out who is on the list that they cover I specifically state I am looking for a female therapist.
When I dont go by insurance listing and call mental health agencies myself I always introduce myself and state...." I am female and am looking for a female therapist who accepts this insurance plan. then the agency tells me whether or not they accept my insurance and whether or not they have female treatment providers. if so we schedule for intake. here in NY treatment providers treat all disorders therefore looking for one that treats any of my problems well the field is wide open. i dont bother with asking do you specialize in such and such because I already know the answer is always yes our agency treatment providers work with those issues.
suggestion ... since it is a big issue for you and your system maybe you can switch to a different treatment provider, or next time when looking for a new treatment provider you can tell the mental health agencies and your insurance that you are a female survivor and work better with female treatment providers. and only select from the female treatment providers on the listing.