Quote:
Originally Posted by bizi
Being bipolar and an alcoholic is tough.
I drank 18 drinks today and don't feel sick like I should...
my tolerance is high and I spread them out over 12 hours.
I am home from vacation...need to get back to dieting and limiting my drinking.
This is the most I have drank in for ever.
I need to get to bed as I start work again in the morning.
hubby is in bed already.
It has been a long time that I have drank this much.
2 weeks ago I met with my sponsor and the last thing she said to me was "don't drink"
I drank a lot over the past 2 weeks. I am supposed to call her when I get back and the next AA meeting is wednesday.
It is an agnostic/atheist group meeting.
AA is very religious, which I am not.
I will approach cautiously.
bizi
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Well, I am happy to hear you are actually surviving this bought of drinking.
First thing is of course not drinking. For me this meant just staying away from the FIRST drink or drug. Some like to say just for today and that is what it amounts to. I could never know for sure if I will drink tomorrow but today I do know about, at least in the moment. Without sobriety, I am not able to function and understand to work the program of RECOVERY.
Please read the chapter A Vision For You in the Big Book.
Remember that no one knows what God or god is, we only know what we believe. Some are pushy and self righteous, especially those that have found IT, the power that actually gives us strength for today. Just know they mean well and form you own person spiritual ideals as you grow with the steps and experiences sober.
Hopefully going to more different meetings and finding some that feel right to you would be good. It is always ok to decide whom we talk with in AA and to just leave a situation. Or simply just say I don't talk about that....religion or whatever else it is you may not want to deal with.
Truth be told, I got a sponsor in my first 90 days, but did talk with lots of people at a Alano club but, at a point I decide that I'd rather stick around those that were new to the program...under a year sober. I had more to say and new bee's are more into discussion rather than telling you like they think it is or should be. Some people at times need to be told what to do simply because they have no idea what to do without the drink or drug to help out with thinking.
Please don't let people have the power to push you to drink or use. If you have problems with something someone is saying in a meeting, this is a great way to learn about ourselves. Think about it after the meetings, when we have time and even keep a little notebook of things that trouble or even great things that were said in meetings or with others.
Sending you all the positive energy just for today!