This. It's quite a bit different when one is actually in the situation and expected to take action. And it isn't merely fear of one's own safety, but also a general feeling of powerlessness and self-doubt. What if I made the wrong call? What if I approached the wife, and then the husband found out, got angry, and took his anger out on his wife? What if the cops only gave him a "stern talking to," and it provoked his wrath?

When I was in high school, there were two DV calls to the house next door, one of which my parents made. My mom and a couple of other people have tried talking to the wife, offering her advice or help. The wife never left, and jail time only seemed to anger the husband.

I'm not saying one shouldn't try to help, but it's a delicate matter and should be handled with care.