Please don't assume you are a sociopath, etc. right now--you have been through a lot of trauma so it could be PTSD. You have had to just survive and you have done the best you can. Keep trying to open up to your psychiatrist. Do you trust them? I hope so. Since you are not 18, your info isn't private but you need for him/ her to understand the stress you have been under. I don't want you to end up with an unfair label. When you have had a chance to grieve and if you can manage to get into a better situation, you may find you are more normal than you think. What you have said in thread makes you sound perfectly "normal" and reasonable from my POV. The people around us can make us crazy. I recommend that you don't pretend to feel something for your stepdad. Just be respectful and keep your distance. When an elder person is on their deathbed, many times, their needs are put first. Having someone living with you who is dying is a very tough situation, no matter how you feel about her. I am sorry things are so tough for you. Hugs.