Thanks ever so much for your responses, interestingly my psychotherapist has advised me to stay away from any 12 step meetings for a couple of weeks until I feel more stable (I'm also bi-polar). I TOTALLY hear you all about the timeline and the shame etc. And although I hold my hand up to being a dry drunk for MANY years, I do have to take prescribed medication for my mental health issues. After all these years I'm NOT entirely sure sitting in meetings and going through the process (again) and yes I got to step 4 (and sat on it for 8 years!!!), is going to help as much as just getting on with it. I've been stuck in inaction for years (probably down to me not working my steps), but in all honesty I need Valium to cope right now and don't feel I can go back until I'm off that. Anyway, thanks a lot, I do appreciate your responses.