Wander, I have been thinking about you. I'm so sorry that the hospital has been a source of stress for you, instead of a retreat or safe haven. I do want to say how important it is not to rush away from intensive treatment. Doing so can exacerbate the situation. If it does end up best for your to leave the hospital, can you maybe go to an Intensive Outpatient program or at least schedule frequent visits to your therapy and psychiatrist?

bluebicycle, both my husband and I have forgotten our badges many times in the past. You're not alone. I'm glad you were allowed to work from home.

Scooter and Blue_Bird, good luck with your medication issues.

Spikes, please do take care. It's your depression talking. I'm sorry you're in such mental pain, my PC friend! Please hang in there until you see your new doctor and therapist. If you do feel a danger to yourself, PLEASE do go to the hospital. It doesn't matter that you've been there a few times this year. What matters is you and your safety. We care and I am certain your family cares very very much. Very much.