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Pygmalion
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Member Since Jul 2019
Location: UK
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Default Jul 19, 2019 at 12:32 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by whimsicalman View Post
That's true. There will be negative people in all groups. As a gay man, I always refer to the LGBTQ communities, in order to make clear that I do not see us all as one homogenous group. It's like saying the Asian community or the Progressive/Liberal Community or the Christian Community. (I am of an asian ethnicity and identify as progressive and Christian.) Everyone who could be labeled any of those things are not the same as everyone else who can also be so-labeled. We have so many different sub-groups and perspectives. The same with the LGBTQs. I mean, can't even say the "gay community" because Ican say definitely from experience that we do not even remotely all fall into the same "community"! But I would offer the perspective that most of those negative forum people tend to be on the more "militant" side of wahtever group they are a part of, hence their being more free to be more outspoken, brash, intolerant, etc. But, you just try not to be baited, triggered, or similar in your own activity, so as to "rise above it," if you will. Not all LGBTQ groups/forums are bad.
True, it is only ever the minority.

But when that minority is allowed to bully, invalidate or harass then the whole thing becomes quite toxic. That has happened to me with three online groups, where it hardly seems me worth hanging about if some people are just going to be personal, mean, and tell me straight up I'm not welcome etc.

And I've heard plenty of others from many orientations say the same thing - the amount of 'in-fighting' and weird gate-keeping amongst sexuality identity groups is crazy. Even in groups that are ostensibly moderated, or advertise themselves as open to all etc.

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