Quote:
Originally Posted by Amyjay
I have so many princesses! I want to able to live without the disruption of pathological dissociation. To get to a point where I am able to have meaningful relationships with others. To no longer experience flashbacks in response to the triggers of trauma all round me in daily life. To be able to experience an authentic relationship with another human being. To get to a point where I can be true and accepting and protective of all parts of myself. Where I can be authentic and full and stand rooted in my own truth.
I hate therapy. I hate the process of it. I hate the vulnerability of it.
I hate that I have to do it in order to achieve the things I want to achieve.
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Trust me I said all that as well. Triggers sending me into flashbacks but most of all not having that child part that needs to be taken care of desperately activated all the time. I said to be able to be in best adult self almost all the time. Right now I am clinging to home like a life boat and do not even understand why? Not like he lives my life with me on daily basis. My internal world changes if he goes away but my psychical world does not.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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